Sorry... TMI?

Warning: this may contain content that could be disturbing or at least awkward for some of my loyal family member readers! Feel free to continue reading, I have no shame, but don't say I didn't warn ya! 

After weeks of misery and no relief I finally decided to give the vaginal Valium suppositories a try! I am the worlds cheapest person and the idea of spending 74 dollars on some thing that may or may not help was a... Hard pill to swallow... (Heh heh) but I wanted relief more than I wanted to be frugal. So my devoted hubby went to the fancy compound pharmacy and picked up the suspicious brown lunch bag. 

When I got it I had no idea what to do so I posted on an IC board and got some great tips and also had a few people ask me to let them know how it works. So I decided to document my first three experiences using it for all of the IC, Vulvadynia, and PFD sufferers out there. 

January 3rd, 2013

9:05AM- The insertion was a lot easier than I expected. My vaginal muscles kind of just did the job for me once I got it in there. I read that I should lay down for about an hour after putting it in so I'll be lying in bed with my legs up if anyone needs me. 

9:38- I don't know if it’s from going to bed super late and now laying in my cozy bed or if it’s from the suppository but I am suddenly really tired! The pain hasn't subsided yet but I can feel it melting in there like a Popsicle on a hot day. 

9:42- Owie! It's starting to burn as it seeps out a little bit. I have some open cuts down there so that may be why… 

10:01- Oh my goodness, the urethral pain is miraculously gone! My bladder is still aching but the constant burning in my urethra that makes sitting and closing my legs painful is nowhere to be seen!! 

10:56- I tried getting out of bed to do a little bit of cleaning and within minutes I felt it making its way south and dripping out. Weird.

11:06- Back in bed with my legs up in the air. The pelvic floor and urethral pain is still gone!! 

11:50- I tried to get up again but it just turns me into a disgusting sort of dripping faucet! 

12:13- Sudden intense cramping in my lower abdomen. It feels like bad menstrual cramps! 

2:06- Well I went pee. It hurt like normal as I went but the post-pee-pain wasn't as horrific as usual. I'm still having bad cramping that comes and goes. I'm going to get in the shower and see if that helps! 

2:51- After being in the shower for almost an hour the urethra pain is coming back. I don't know if it’s wearing off, it's been washed away, it's all dripped out or if the pain is just breaking through but it's annoying! 

 So I have to say this day has been inconclusive! I'm definitely thinking I'll try it at bedtime next time because the dripping was obnoxious. One of the many weird things that goes along with my IC is that I can't stand wearing underwear! The waistband hurts my bladder and the mere presence of the tight fabric on my lady bits irritates it. So the vag drippings were extra annoying. I spent the day sitting on a towel after realizing it got all over my sheets. 

The cramping could have been coincidental but it felt like period cramps which I rarely get these days since I get the depo shot. I am rejoicing that it helped my urethral and vaginal pain though! After this first trial I think it’s going to be a great tool to have in my IC tool box!!

Trial number 2

January 4th, 2013

Well... My hubby and I had um... marital bonding time... this evening. Now I'm in the routine torturous pain that follows. So I decided to give the Valium another try! It is late at night so I'm hoping the dripping won't be as bad and if there's cramping again it will just be after I'm asleep! Here goes nothing!

10:32PM- Another successful insertion, the pain is so bad that I did it while in the shower and I am just hoping that I can get out before it starts melting! 

While we're on the edges of our heating pad and tubs waiting to hear what happens let’s just talk about IT. I know we're all thinking about IT. I think IT is one of the hardest yet least talked about subjects in the IC world. Doing IT is really, really painful for us with IC. IT is such an important part of marriages and yet IT is the single most disruptive things we can do to our pathetic pelvic floors! 

The actual act of doing IT can be tolerable if certain rules are followed. However some times in the moment the rules are out the window and I'm the one that pays. My urethra is my greatest foe and yet it lays just mere centimeters from the uh... entrance and the bladder is propped right above. So any pressure in the wrong direction and the wrong kind of fireworks erupt.

So if you could imagine IT isn't easy but after 4 years of practice we are getting the hang of IT. The most important things are to make sure to use lots of lubricant, avoid the previously mentioned areas, and to take things slow. Also know that every time is different and you just have to be patient. Something that hurt last time might be fine this time and something that usually is okay could feel like blazing daggers. You and your hubby have to take time and try different things.  Also, be open to the fact that sometimes IT’s just not going to happen. Honestly my husband is just as happy with a back rub while he watches a new episode of Duck Dynasty. Maybe not JUST as happy but you know…

However! No matter how bad, tolerable, or good IT goes the post-relations is always misery. If I can plan ahead I take pain meds before but if not, my first act is to take meds then head straight to the shower. My bits are always very swollen after IT and the burning is shocking. Like I check for flames and have the fire extinguisher ready.

Anyway... Back to my Valium diary.... 

12:22- Still no relief. It's still burning like the fires of hell!! 

12:50- Cramping is starting!!! 

Sunday January 5th, 2013

8:08am- Well I just woke up... I must have eventually dosed off despite the pain last night. I just had my morning pee and it was just as painful as ever!! 

So I will say I definitely didn't like the night time theory. I feel like I just wasted $2.46. By the time it kicked in I was already asleep and when I woke up it had already worn off. Oh well… it was worth a shot!

Trial 3

January 6th, 2013

I’ve been in the shower since 8 this morning and I need relief so I am going to try it again!

1:18PM- The insertion went ok, I decided to put it in while I’m in the shower again but since I was sitting I didn't feel like it went in as far as before. 

1:22- I am already feeling it melting and the urethra pain seems to have eased! Wow that was fast!

1:23- I stood up to get out of the shower and felt the thick, warm goop oozing out so I quickly ran to bed with my legs shut and laid on a towel! The urethra pain is gone but now I feel confined to bed because of the dripping. 

Side note- I did talk to my doctor today and she mentioned that I could leave it out of the fridge until it kind of melts and then apply it more like a topical medicine around the areas the hurt! I'll have to try that next time! 

2:14- I am having some cramping but if I keep the heating pad on me it is tolerable. 

2:30- The original pain is still gone so I took my towel and my heating pad downstairs where I made a nice little nest on the couch. It's great to have the pain gone and be out of the shower, it's just a bummer that I'm finally feeling good and have to stay lying down. 

5:12- I had to get up to get my kiddos dinner ready. I walked around like a Barbie's whose legs have been tied together. I still couldn't put on any underwear or pants so I waddled around in my robe trying to keep from dripping on the floor. EW!

6:01- The pain is back, headed to the shower! 

Well after three different scenarios I do totally acknowledge that it works amazingly! It erases any pelvic floor or urethral pain I'm feeling which is generally what keeps me in the shower. 

However it does cause moderate cramping and the whole dripping thing is difficult, especially if there are any cuts. The valium getting into the open cuts is brutal but I would much rather be stuck on a towel with a heating pad and tiny paper cut burns in bed than in the shower writhing around in agony! (Drama!)

I think my third trial will be how I use it most often. If I've been in the shower for a while with no other hope of escape the Valium seems like a great option! If I'm going to be useless and stuck somewhere it might as well be the couch and in less pain!

So my recommendation is to give it a try! The urethral and vaginal pain relief alone is worth all the hassle!! 

If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask! I'm an open book… as if you couldn't tell already!